So I guess my emotional, analytical, dreamer child has been tickled, because tonight I'm going crazy.
When I am involved in conversations that provoke thoughts, challenge my present, encourage my spirit to deepen and push me forward into finding more of me... It's like a flower blossoms.
Tonight I had one of those conversations via text message. On my end, it was incredible. I spoke about stuff that's going on inside me, and let a little of my passion shine through about love, and about truth and about past and reconciliation and about present and future and dreams and faith and compassion.
There's so much going on inside me right now. My heart feels like it's about ready to explode.
My senses are so on edge, and I just feel like something is going to happen, something IS happening.
A few months ago, i felt an urgency to prepare. To just... BE READY. For what I have NO idea, but just to be ready. And I had no idea how to prepare, but now, things are happening that I'm like... Soooo eager about.
Things like when I hear worship, TRUE, genuine, WORSHIP, I start to feel it in my bones like I used to.
Things like relationships becoming unusually real and sincere. Gah.. I don't really know how to explain it.
It's incredible.
I have the biggest urge to love. Just love, love, love. With a smile, with a kiss or hug, with words, with money, with genuine random acts of kindness, with laughter, with just hanging out with people and showing them how genuinely amazing they are.
I want to do that full time. All the time. On a regular basis, without restrictions and curfews and hesitations and liability. Just like I'm starting to do now.
I love to see someone just be loved... for them. I love when I can feel SOOOO happy just to be around someone, and show it to them, and they feel special, they feel loved, they feel unique and perfect, if even for a moment. Everyone deserves that because it's who they are.
Maybe I'm a fool for believing the best in people and always seeing the good, because humans and humanity is plain BAD and i know that. But if I'm a fool, I swear I'll be a fool till I die.
I've been saying absent mindedly for the past few weeks "i'm ready."
Ready? For What? Who Knows. But when it comes, I'll be ready! And I'm so excited that I can barely take it.
About
- Mrs.Chembars
- I mean... what is there to say, really? Joy is my name, Laughter is my language. I'm a Georgia peach -- born and raised.. -- I have a story, but we all do. There's not enough time, or space to describe what I'm passionate about..But I am passionate. There's so many things I want to do in life. There's so many places I want to go, people I want to reach. The possibilities are endless. I am a musician. I'm a dancer. I am a photographer, poet, reader, writer, jock, nerd, city girl, beach girl, sweet southern girl.I'm sophisticated. I'm down to earth. I am a sister, a daughter, a worshipper. I am learning, falling, growing. I am laughter, I am tears. I am joy. I am fear. I am strong, I am delicate. I wish. I pray. I enlighten, inspire, encourage, intrigue. I disappoint, I frustrate. I'm a thinker, I'm a doer. I'm sarcastic, I'm sincere. I doubt, I cry, I live and I have died. I am passion. I'm a lover, I'm in love, I am love. I am all of the above. But it's not really about me.... is it?
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