after

work. ugh.

I really do enjoy work. I like fashion retail probably more than anything else that I've done, except singing, but for some reason, people are really starting to annoy me.

Like inconsiderate people. Alot of times, people just think "oh, I'll leave this here, because they'll clean it up.. it's their job." or they'll stay until after 9, knowing that we close at 9, and that we still have to close everything down.

I promised myself that I would never shop passed 830 again, if the store closed at 9. Ugh.
Idk, also with all the stuff coming up, there's just alot of things I need and want to be doing.

But it is money for africa, or for when i get back!

*sigh*.

I am sitting on my bed at the Farber's house (they've graciously bestowed a blessing on me -- opening their home to me until we go to africa) in the silence. NOT like me at all. I think I just need chill time or something. I've been going all day.... and at work for 6 hours listening to blaring music.... i love music.... seriously, i do, but there's always a need for some silence.

it's kinda nice.


i've been thinking about something lately.

the future.

hah. so unusual.... esp. for me. (i'm futuristic and a dreamer, def. not a realist.)
no but really..
thinking about.. growing up.

i mean i guess this is right about the time that one would start to think of such things.. right?
no but for real... been thinking of things like.... marriage *gasp* and .... a home *gasp gasp*
lol. finishing school, what i want to do with my future.... and a future with someone else in it. ;) no one...specific... really.. *cough* :D


but no really... there's a ton of stuff I want to do, but its narrowed alot.
I've wanted to do everything from plastic surgery to being an international buyer to singer/model/actress/dancer to teacher to stay-at-home-mom to volleyball player to missionary to veterenarian to nurse to theologian to interior decorator to photographer to enterpernuer or whatever. i mean like.. everything. except astronaut.
but yeah, that's narrowed down. since i know my calling its narrowed down, but also circumstancially its narrowed too..
I do know that I want to go to school and finish school.
I do know that I want to worship and lead worship.
I do know that I want a healthy, happy family.
I do know that I want to be 1 person that starts a wildfire of love in the world.
I do know that I want and need to do something about human trafficking.
I do know that I want to mother.
I do know that I have a long way to go.
I do know that it's achievable.



hmm..



all for now.

lovelove