Readjusting

How do you really readjust to life the "way it was" when you've just experienced something life altering??
I guess you really can't.. I don't think you're meant too.

I know that I can't be the same.

My life since we got back from Africa has been......... i don't really know.
I'm trying hard not to fall back into the old ways of life - rushing around non stop, not taking time for me, doing doing doing doing doing, filling my schedule, being late, wishin i had more hours in a day, being in a constant state of worry...
I dont want to be that any more.

Africa taught me so many things... one of which is that you really don't have time to waste time, and the best way to use that, is sometimes wasting time. Especially with God.

I read an amazing book that has really changed my life in a lot of ways - "Into Abba's Arms" by Sandra D. Wilson, and one thing she wisely stated was, "it's OKAY to waste time with God."
What a cool statement... that God has all the time in the world, literally, and we have the time to waste it with Him. As a matter of fact, who says its really "wasting" time anyways, when its possibly the greatest investment of your time?

Thats one thing I learned. I also learned some time management as weird as that is. I seem to be not rushing around any more.. In Kenya, I heard a saying from a wise man - "No hurry, no worry." That's SO true. If you're not rushing and hurrying everywhere and with everything you do, you won't have to worry... you can actually enjoy what youre doing when you're doing it. There was one time at an orphanage in Kakamega, Kenya, when we had probably the most slow-paced 2 weeks during the whole trip, and alot of people might get frusterated at the slowness, but I loved everything being pole pole (slow). I loved being able to just walk around, watch people, write in my journal, talk, think, pray, read.... I loved it. So I guess now that I'm back, I've kinda calmed down a bit on all my hurriedness. It just makes sense. Leave more cushion time for things you do, and you wont have to rush, and you can look around you and really feel things, use all your senses, and not be numb.

Of course, getting back to work, getting back to the making appointments and meeting up and being certain places at certain times is something that I have to do in this culture, just like we had to wear long skirts and eat alot of food in the African culture. I'm okay with it for now, just taking things a day at a time.
My best friend told me that something clicked to her one time over the summer...

That in scripture, in Psalms, it says "Your Word is a lamp to my feet, and a light for my path", and she said she realized that it could possibly mean that God is the light for our feet, and the path to where we're going, like holding a flashlight. It helps you to see, but not very far ahead, and not very much around you, just one step at a time, one foot in front of the other... I am taking life back in the states that way.... One day, one step, one foot at a time... And so far, its working, because all I can really do is trust that God knows, even if I dont.


I want to continue to make a difference in peoples lives, here, and in Africa, and wherever I go...
I want to be the person that stands true to their word when they say they're going to do something like "go back" or "send letters" or "donate."


I hope that you are somehow challenged in your life to do the same... make a difference somewhere, in some way.

There's more than just you in this planet, just like there's more than just me... and we are here for each other... really.


So what will it be today? What about tomorrow?


Nakupenda sana